“Egypt: A Journey of Healing and Initiation”
The Turning Point: Difficult Choices
After a period of time, after I got out of hospital, my wife and I sat down and had a serious talk about where we were going from here. Even though we both loved each other deeply, we decided it was time for me to move on and work deeper on my own healing journey, and for her to move on with her life.
As I said, we loved each other dearly, but it wasn’t a relationship that could move forward. We loved each other in terms of care, and it wasn’t appropriate for us to stay together as a couple. So we moved forward with our lives, with no further contact because it was too painful.
Delving Into Crystals: Tools for Inner Healing
I started looking at ways to delve deep into my own healing. I had been advised to work with crystals and decided I was very passionate about exploring them more deeply. I spent several months traveling around various crystal shops in the south of the country and attending crystal fairs, gradually building a comprehensive collection.
I used the crystals to work on many aspects of myself. I would sit for hours meditating, using their resonance to break down the negative thought forms I had created. I began to understand the separation of masculine and feminine energy. When the balance between goddess and God was broken, it left a void. In this void, I created negative thought forms and inner demons. These thought forms fed my paranoia, anxiety, and depression. Each time I encountered someone carrying these frequencies, my mind amplified them, feeding on the fear and terror I generated.
I spent hours with these crystals, breaking down these negative thought forms and patterns.
Discovering Egyptian Magic: My First Retreat
I also became drawn to Egyptian magic and the Egyptian pantheon, and decided to go on a course in Egypt. This course was initiations into the Egyptian pantheon — my first retreat, my first real experience beyond Reiki and books, into what real healing and real magic felt like.
On arrival in Egypt, I realized the course was held in a private house on a street facing the Sphinx and the Great Pyramid — a serene view from the balcony. After a meal, we started meditating the next day. I asked the meditation guide how I was supposed to relax, since I was used to meditating quietly at home. She simply said, “It’s all part of your reality. You integrate it, accept it’s there, and focus on what you’re doing.”
It was easier said than done, but with practice over the next couple of days, I began to understand that I didn’t need to shut out the noise. I just needed to allow it and focus on my meditation.
Sacred Sites and Solo Initiation
During this trip, we visited sacred sites in Cairo and one ancient pyramid not open to the public. We galloped across the desert on horseback. When I arrived at the pyramid, I was asked to see the guard on duty. I paid a backsheesh to gain entry. This wasn’t a formal tourist trip; it was arranged by a local.
I went into the pyramid on my own. I climbed the steps into a small meter-square hole and made my way down into the chambers. About halfway down, I looked up — the entrance seemed smaller, a flicker of light appeared further down. I continued through a couple of chambers and ended up in the death chamber, right in the middle of the pyramid, completely alone. A deep sense of grounding came over me. I didn’t yet understand the impact, but the experience enabled me to get in touch with a connection I’d sensed through past lives in Egypt.
Back at the house that afternoon, the course guide took me into the outskirts of Cairo to visit a seer. We navigated back alleys and underground rooms. She explained that I had past lives in Egypt and that more information would come through.
Fear, Love, and the Hospital
Later, we did Sufi dancing on the balcony — completely new to me. For some reason, the chief of police turned up, and I ended up dancing with him. Later that night, we went into the back streets, drinking beer and eating. Suddenly, I walked into the middle of the street and began roaring like a lion — my initiation, connecting with Ma’at, the lion-headed Egyptian goddess.
Towards the end of the week, the couple hosting the retreat began arguing. One evening, the husband told me I had brought negative energy into their house. I felt anxious, but the wife explained I wasn’t the cause — I was mirroring energy already present in their relationship. This helped me understand how we mirror situations for others to see, and how they mirror back to reveal what still needs attention within ourselves.
Returning Home and Expanding Consciousness
After Egypt, I returned home and continued meditating and working with crystals. I became drawn to crystal skulls, which helped expand my consciousness and release negative thought patterns. I eventually came across a person in America focused on crystal skulls, organizing a trip to Peru to search for an ancient blue quartz crystal skull.
This journey in Egypt became a foundation — my first initiation into deeper spiritual work, guiding me toward Peru and the next stage of my healing.
Are You Ready To Continue Your Journey
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If something here has resonated, you’re welcome to get in touch. This work isn’t about fixing or forcing change, but about gentle support and understanding as you move through your own process, in your own time.
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